The Club's Results

Taking to the water in the belief that Sarah was the one competitor with as little sculling experience as I, I displayed confidence if not expertise during my sedate paddle to the start.

However, a very shaky start allowed my adversary to move comfortably ahead within my first half-dozen strokes, providing conclusive proof that either
a) I am a girl or
b) SAT's 'sculling' experience was rather more extensive than mine (Martin)

"Lamb to the slaughter" is the expression that springs to mind.

I enjoyed my "race", although once "safely" across the line was saddened to find that there was no sign of Emily at all so comfortable was her win.

The crushing defeats to the fairer sex were greeted by frenzied excitement on the bank and even inspired mr earl to submit an instant announcement of my achievements worldwide via the internet. My meagre total of just 3 sculling outings in the last five years appeared to do little to deflate the glee with which my "supporters" mocked my efforts.

However, the moral victory over the innumerable landlubbers (even including a recent Granta colour) who declined to join me risking life and limb is unquestionably mine. (Martin)